What could go wrong? Faced with the prospect of not getting into Zion until after 3pm (and that’s even a maybe) we, well Jenny, called every possible shuttle for a last minute opening — which was a stress-enduring experience, well for Jenny anyway. By some miracle, we landed on Zion Outfitters (not an advertisement but highly recommend) who said they had a 830am shuttle. It was 8:05. Long short — mad dash success that even the outfitters were impressed.
It was even more of a miracle because had we not gone with them, we never would have seen the swarms of people renting canyoneering shoes (basically moon boots so don’t plan on a fashion statement), socks and poles. If you ever decide to do this hike, RENT THE SHOES, SOCKS AND POLES. This from the person who read the 2974 blogs and reviews that said “don’t drive a car into Pena” (Portugal). So I went ahead and drove a car into Pena. (Don’t drive a car into Pena.) Also, “good waterproof shoes” doesn’t mean Keens as we were going to attempt to use. This is a 4.5 mile hike (one way) so don’t be a bro.
It was a balmy 54° F outside which once again raised the “what was I thinking” mantra. We’d be hiking through ankle to waist deep water in the Virgin River, and the water was an even more invigorating 45°F (“F” is right), navigating rocks that are slicker than snot on a doorknob. We were immediately happy for the rental choice since even at ankle deep, the current, mixed with slick, uneven rocks made for potential comedy.
The Narrows are called as such because it’s the narrowest section of Zion Canyon. We hiked the “bottom up” route, meaning upstream (not uphill!) The thousand foot walls both dwarfed us and left us in utter awe. It mostly didn’t seem a place like this should be possible. Yet it is.
The other thing that didn’t seem possible was people hiking through waist deep water… water containing toxic Cyanobacteria bloom (a toxic algae that was discovered because it killed a dog within 20 minutes of drinking it)…while wearing masks. I will say no more.
There were plenty of other things that also didn’t seem possible or well reasoned. People wading through the water in parkas, hats, gloves (it was cold but not that cold!) open toed sandals, shower shoes, and BABIES. Yes. At least 3 people had their less than 6 month old infant strapped to the front of them. So Reese? That whole “you brought a baby into a bar” thing needs to be updated to “you brought a baby into a river with a known agent of death, and a fall into the water with your BABY could be fatal. I put my camera away because I was concerned about it getting wet.
So! Here are the things you need in The Narrows: canyoneering boots, socks, and walking stick, plenty of water (we were camels and went through 2L each and it wasn’t hot in the slightest), plenty of snacks, the ability to abide by slow and steady wins the race, shorts and sunscreen. That’s not a joke. We waded through mostly shade for 6 hours and managed to both get slightly burned. With sunscreen on. So if you think UV clothes are a scam? Ask Jenny’s tummy that was burned in the shade with 50SPF and through a shirt. This sun ain’t playin’ out here. The Gatorade was also a God send.
What don’t you need in the Narrows? (all based on things witnessed or errors made). The aforementioned pool shoes, waterproof pants, jeans, a reusable bag from Cosco to carry your provisions, sunglasses (mostly unnecessary), cross body purses, toilet paper (there’s really no where to hide away to pee anyway), a 35mm camera (unless you’re Ansel Adams, your iPhone will be just fine), subzero clothing, cockiness (you do get a little brave after awhile), a dog (yes, saw one of those too and she KNEW the story), an extra battery pack, extra camera batteries (because you’re leaving the 35mm back at the hotel, right?), a lack of food and water, and BABIES. You do not need your baby in the toxic river.
I mean come on. Jenny ended up dropping her extra water bottle then proceeded to accidentally dip her water bladder mouth piece into the river (doin it for the Gram!) and we refused to touch them after that. We got a serious warning to not touch them and we could thoroughly wash them out before using again. (Although there were some night terrors last night…) That was probably getting geared and psyched up for Angels Landing tomorrow.
Note; props to anyone doing this earlier in the season when water levels can be chest high with temps much warmer than we experienced. That’s baller. This is seriously one of the most amazing jaw-dropping hikes you will ever do and is a must-experience for anyone who is not afraid of water, with a good sense of balance, and childless. At least for the day.
INJURY UPDATE: Poked by a stick. Hope the river toxins don’t strike me dead.
Roam Free 